(January 2007)
Love, I thought, a door to breathe.
A smell mortal. From the moment that made the case that he offered me, my heart was pounding. But it was the case, really? Had I not chosen to enter at last into his car and tell him everything.
I still remember the hard thinking about how I looked, I had a new recipes. The smell that I felt could not be a coincidence, I tried for days that essence, then, I waited without saying anything.
What impression had to get my body in those pictures scattered on the dashboard? The head of a madwoman, her back like a page torn. Stamps differently decorated, honored or dishonored, provocative, striking out. The legs obscenely wide open. The wrists tied. Away, or right there, tossed with a smile in the foreground.
photos scattered everywhere, of course, among the things unmentionable. On dirty mats. Underfoot.
Mark my body looked shaken while a man was putting me in a different and completely filled my mouth. It was still a vivid sensation experienced, lost and forgotten. Loss of adhesion and for a few moments, and death.
was crazy to see me at that time. Impaled. Open. It was damn exciting.
felt that I was wet again, it was strange, so try those emotions away.
I wanted to scream, but Mark - the stern face - expressing embarrassment. Avid repulsion.
I realized that an explosive charge had begun to wander, and could explode at any moment.
I got a jolt when the car he left suddenly, as if a mirror was broken, Mark led with equal detachment. In so doing synergy a note came up to me, which I accepted with enthusiasm physical impotence.
Carabinieri officer, Mark, was a friend even though he had never created a real relationship. More than anything else take advantage of him often.
He had a soft spot for me when I needed and always gave a helping hand.
When we arrived at her apartment, a penthouse in a quiet neighborhood, yet hesitated a reminder that more accurate impression, a man imprisoned.
The building was modern, a stone's throw from the old Roman walls. The sun had begun to wane among the trees and the cultivated garden was impeccable English.
I tried something different in the air, a feeling came back and flowed. There was a bitter scent of oleander and laurel, a smell of sodden earth that demanded respect. A breathtaking smell, a perfume that I already knew. Of sadness and sex.
A smell unreal, fine wood, but delicate at the same time. Startled when I entered the building again, a strange pain filled my belly and at the same time forced me to take a decision. The time it takes to feel broken, live, cold. The body is off.
The walls of granite, the elevator acid green, the hall decorated with plants inappropriate, it was all strangely familiar. I already knew but did not remember when. For some time I arrived and I had not ever gone.
On the other hand, no one may leave himself.
Marco opened the entrance and sun flooded the entrance, meanders through the stained glass windows light the room. In a moment I rushed inside, I sudden rush.
then I looked at Mark, he was upset, his eyes glassy, \u200b\u200bfixed at a point unknown.
The eyes have searched me for a moment and I was certain that we wanted the same thing.
The wait made him mad.
When we drank from your mouth the taste of rain, the smell of clay, wet and organic that January was to complicated. I wanted to whisper to me take away, there, facing the wall. Tearing the silence against the walls shiny gray, the smell of paint scraped would not have forgotten.
Discovery. Torn myself. Entrance on the dresser. Filled again. For a moment complete. I wanted to scold him or maybe pray. Fuck me.
of pride perhaps, however, said nothing.
does not react when I heard him behind his back, slipping slightly, his hands like birds on the buttocks. Breathing down your neck. The scent, that scent, shot in the throat, choking me.
For a while, 'Marco and I made love almost every night in that apartment, a jump in his arms it was a form of suicide.
I enjoyed in her mouth every time he has enjoyed in mine. Our tricks have lasted weeks. They hired bizarre features, handcuffs service, the triggering of the hook, the rings were biting the flesh to bursting; more than had been possible the last time, Mark loved the sound of metal, used it. I did not ask.
Orgasm is threatened in me like a shell on a rock.
The only time it really hit me was when I came the M16 to my crack, which had that weight metal. I looked into his eyes and read that desire to continue to enjoy that bordered on the desire to kill. Fuck me with that statue in every way, digging deep holes in which sank quickly.
The sphincter muscles are shaped perfectly to his cock, as if all the times I sodomized, between the belly and hot metal, hurled the sperm that could clear the track of who I was.
But I loved him. I'd never have loved and not wanted, but I could not shake it.
was a sense of urgency to precipitate events, to regain control of my body.
Living on the edge of consciousness for months, days, artificial, a sort of suspension, but this remote, closed in sorrow, in disappointment, I began to reply as soon as the kiss of my lover.
space to fill became bigger and bigger and Marco realized that the current was changing its course, for a while 'remained unperturbed and continued to conquer. He tried to back to the heart.
but swallowed his failure.
As the heat was mounting on the surface beneath the caresses, the progression of skin jumped out of memories and it was a smoking gun: the scar of my convalescence came to an end. Only reality gave reality to the pain, we left early.
A smell had persisted to impregnate the skin, attracting, and in one fell swoop had disguised desire. Inbrogliandolo. He revived an absent, the memory made it possible to find Michael.
Love me and make me suffer, I asked, as if Mark was an old scar of the Master. The latest injury, a silent groan. I was full of unexpressed tenderness.
It happened in a transparent manner, in his memory, Mark was a belt, and then the pain relief.
The smell of a confession difficult to tell when you are trying to rearrange a puzzle.
When everything seems the same but nothing is equal.
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